Curious about Attachment Parenting? Attached at the Heart (iUniverse Star, 2009) is a thorough yet concise overview of the principles and practice of Attachment Parenting, written by the two founders of Attachment Parenting International.
Attached at the Heart Provides an Overview of Attachment Parenting
Attachment Parenting is a parenting philosophy based on the idea that forming and maintaining a strong attachment between parent and child is the most important factor in successful parenting. Obedience, respect, politeness and an interest in learning will all grow from a strong attachment relationship, whereas oppositional behaviour, anxiety, lack of empathy and disrespect are behaviours that arise from a lack of a strong, empathic attachment relationship.
The term Attachment Parenting was coined by pediatrician Dr. Sears but has been adopted by empathetic parents worldwide, including the founders of the grasssroots nonprofit organization, Attachment Parenting International, Barbara Nicholson and Lysa Parker, who are the authors of Attached at the Heart.
The 8 Parenting Principles
Nicholson and Parker have organized Attached at the Heart into chapters based on the 8 Parenting Principles of Attachment Parenting, also known as Dr. Sears’ Baby Bs. These are:
- Prepare yourself for pregnancy, birth and parenting.
- Feed with love and respect.
- Respond with sensitivity.
- Use nurturing touch.
- Ensure safe sleep, physically and emotionally.
- Provide consistent, loving care.
- Practice positive discipline.
- Strive for balance in your personal and family life.
Each chapter describes what it means to parent according to that principle, with examples of using infant massage to provide the benefits of nurturing touch or how to co-sleep safely so that parents can respond quickly and easily to a baby’s nighttime needs. At the end of each chapter is a list of further resources, such as additional books and websites dedicated to the topics in that chapter.
Scientific Studies Back up Each Parenting Principle
One of the strengths of Attached at the Heart are the many references to scientific studies that support the use of the Principles of Attachment Parenting, such as the effect of spanking on children as they grow or data regarding the safety of infants sleeping in a crib versus bedsharing with a responsible adult.
For many people, the practices of bedsharing, babywearing, breastfeeding or natural birth are unfamiliar or have been discouraged by previous generations. Having scientific research that demonstrates the benefits of these parenting practices can go a long way to convince sceptics.
A Good Starting Point for Attachment Parenting
Attached at the Heart is a great place to get an overview of what Attachment Parenting means and what it looks like in practice. Parents who choose to parent in this style will most likely come up with questions or need more detail in certain areas, such as gentle discipline. The resource lists at the end of each chapter provide an excellent springboard to further reading on Attachment Parenting.
New or expectant parents might feel intimidated by all the studies that show the harmful effects of mainstream parenting practices, such as sleep training or spanking, but Nicholson and Parker reassure parents that parenting is a journey, not something they can do perfectly from the start. Attachment parenting should not be about guilt or martyrdom, but about parents doing the best they can and showing respect and empathy for children.
Attached at the Heart is a great introduction to the big names and foundation of ideas that Attachment Parenting is based on. With a solid balance between theory and practical tips and ideas and comprehensive collection of references to additional resources, Attached at the Heart is a valuable addition to any parenting library.
Michelle Carchrae - Michelle Carchrae has worked as a Volunteer Phone Counselor at Childline and as a Training Developer and Call Centre Trainer, but the job ...
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